The Four Types of Love: Which One Defines Your Relationships?

Love is complex, yet most of the love we experience fits a small set of patterns. When you understand the 4 types of love, you can notice what is happening in your life, choose better words, and offer care that lands. This guide walks through the four types of love from classic Greek ideas, gives modern examples, answers common questions, and shows simple ways to apply each type of love in a real relationship.

 

 

Quick overview, the four different kinds of love in plain words

People often ask, how many types of love are there. You will see long lists online, yet the ancient Greeks focused on four enduring forms that still make sense today.

• Eros, romantic and passionate love, strong attraction and physical desire
• Philia, friendship and goodwill, trust and steady care
• Storge, family love and parent-child love, natural warmth and loyalty
• Agape, generous and selfless love, sometimes called unconditional love

These different types of love are a simple classification that helps you name the variety of bonds in daily life. Think of them as an easy love classification you can use to reflect and choose your next step.

Eros, romantic love with heat and focus

Eros is romantic love and erotic love, often fast and bright. You feel drawn toward another person, you crave closeness, and physical energy rises. In Greek myth, Eros is a Greek god who stirs desire. Many know the tale of Eros and Psyche, a story that explores the nature of love and trust.

How Eros feels

• Butterflies, fast pulse, strong pull
• Daydreams and plans, falling in love
• A wish for physical love, kisses, affection, physical contact

Where it helps

• It sparks a bond that can grow into enduring love when guided by honesty and care

Where it risks

• It can tip toward obsessive love if fear and control creep in, slow down and add friendship habits to steady the bond

Search notes you might see

• People write eros love to name this kind of love

Everyday example

• You plan dinner, you hold hands on the walk, you feel seen and desired. That is love and affection working together.

Philia, friendship love and the joy of equal regard

Philia is friendship love, goodwill, and mutual respect, the love between friends who wish each other well. The Greeks prized philia because a city runs on trust. The city of brotherly love takes its name from this root.

How Philia feels

• Shared jokes, honest feedback, rides to the airport
• Celebrating a win, showing up when it is hard
• The love of good friendship that grows over time

Where it helps

• It keeps couples strong because lovers who are friends repair faster and share love more freely

Everyday example

• You sit with a friend during a tough week. You care for and love them in steady, practical ways. That, too, is real love.

Common question

• What is friendship love called, the classical answer is philia. It is the form of love that fuels teams, neighbors, and partners who support one another.

Storge, family love that feels natural and protective

Storge is family love, the easy warmth of home and kin, the bond that grows through shared routines and years of small moments. People often ask whether there is any philia to mommy loving, the better word here is storge, the tender bond of a parent and child.

How Storge feels

• Cozy dinners, inside jokes, holiday rituals
• Affectionate love that seems to come without effort
• Faithful presence during illness or stress

Where it helps

• It steadies homes, it guards children, it keeps adult siblings in touch

Everyday example

• A parent packs lunch, a teen saves a seat, love shared in tiny ways all week. That is natural love in action.

 

Agape, selfless love that chooses the good of the other

Agape is generous, selfless love that gives without tallying. Many Christian writers lift it up as agape love, God’s love, god's love, and a Christian virtue. Scripture says that God is love, and calls communities to love one another. In that frame, love directed toward the vulnerable mirrors love for God, and love for us calls us to care for and love our neighbor.

How Agape feels

• Patience, mercy, practical kindness
• Choosing the other’s good when there is little in it for you
• A universal love for people you will never meet

Where it helps

• It heals conflict, mends communities, and makes a house feel safe

Everyday example

• You help a sick neighbor with groceries with no thought of return. That is agape at work.

Search and tradition notes

• People ask for four kinds of love in the Bible or what are the four loves, many point to agape, philia, storge, and eros

• C. S. Lewis wrote about the three natural loves, storge, philia, eros, and set agape apart as charity

Why the Greeks named love in parts

People ask are there different kinds of love and what types of love are there. According to the ancient Greeks, naming parts made it easier to talk about choices. When love is often just one word, we miss how different a first kiss is from a neighborly meal. The Greek words let us say more with care.

You will also see four types of love Greek, 4 Greek loves, and four different kinds of love on study guides. That is this same simple map. The ancient Greeks studied love because love comes in many shapes, and words help us steer those shapes toward good.

Other forms you will hear people mention

Modern lists sometimes add more entries. You may see 8 different types of love to include playful and long haul forms, or even how many forms of love are there and how many different types of love are there. These add color without erasing the core four.

• Ludus, a playful love, flirting and lightness
• Pragma, an enduring love, a long partnership that works well
• Philautia, philautia is a healthy self regard, knowing you are worthy of love
• Mania, a stormy bond, often called obsessive love, a warning to slow down

These extras remind us that love compared across seasons shifts shape. Still, the four loves remain a strong base for most stories.

How many different kinds of love are there, a quick answer

If you ask how many kinds of love are there, the core is 4. If you ask how many different kinds of love are there, modern writers may give six to ten as a teaching tool. Use the count that helps you reflect. The goal is wiser choices, not winning a quiz.

You might also spot how many types of love, how many different types of love are there, what kinds of love is there, and what types of love are there. All of these point back to the same idea, name what you feel so you can guide what you do.

What each type looks like in daily life

Eros in practice

• You plan dates, you keep consent clear, you savor physical closeness like holding hands, kisses, warm touches. This is physical love grounded in care.

Philia in practice

• You check in, you help friends move, you listen. That is brotherly love in action.

Storge in practice

• You keep family rituals, you show up at games and recitals, you protect without smothering. That is family love that grows memory by memory.

Agape in practice

• You give time, money, or attention to someone outside your circle, you forgive, you serve. That is selfless love that makes neighborhoods kinder.

When you see love built out of small habits, you can also see love without drama. It is steady and strong, an everlasting love feel that shows up day after day.

Common questions people ask about the four types

What are the four different types of love, short version
Eros, desire and romantic love, philia, friendship, storge, family love, agape, generous and unconditional love.

Is there any philia to mommy loving, what should we call it
For parent care, use storge. For strong friendship between adults, use philia.

What are the four kinds of love in the Bible
Many teachers link the four to scripture as agape, philia, storge, eros. Passages that say love one another point toward agape. Stories of kin loyalty point toward storge.

What is friendship love called
That is philia, the steady goodwill of peers and partners.

Are there different types of love relationships
Yes. You can have a type of love with a partner, a type of love with a friend, and a different type with family. Naming helps you guard each wisely.

What are the 4 different types of love in Greek thought
The same four, and yes, you will see 4 types of love Greek or 4 Greek loves in study notes.

How does love for God fit these words
Many writers pair love for God with agape, a gift that gives and forgives. Some readers will say God’s love or god's love to name that source.

What about the city named for love
Philadelphia is famous as a city of brotherly love, a nod to philia.

Do these words cover every bond
No list covers all love that exists. These four cover most of the love found in home, friendship, romance, and service.

How to use the four in a real relationship

1. Name the bond you are feeding
   Ask, is this moment about romantic love, friendship, family love, or selfless love for someone outside the circle.

2. Match action to form
   For eros, plan a date and keep consent strong. For philia, show up and help. For storge, keep rituals. For agape, serve someone who cannot repay you.

3. Balance the mix
   Great couples hold both eros and philia. Parents live out storge and model agape in the neighborhood.

4. Check your direction
   Ask whether the love directed at this person brings them good. If not, adjust.

5. Keep language gentle
   Use words that honor the person and invite honest talk. That is how love shared grows.

A short note on sources and words

Writers from Plato to Paul to Lewis wrestled with these themes. Lewis’s essay on the four loves names the three natural loves and lifts agape as a gift. Churches teach agape love as service. Poets praise eros. Friends lean on philia. Parents keep storge alive. Across history, types of love found in texts and songs echo what we live at home.

If you enjoy etymology, the Greek words help. Eros gives us erotic. Philia appears in many terms for hobbies and cities. Storge shows up less, yet the feeling is familiar. Agape shows in sermons and service projects.

Compare four loves and love languages, quick clarity

People ask for love compared to other models. The four loves describe kinds of bonds. Love languages describe how you express love and how you receive it inside any bond. You can use both. In a romantic bond, you can nurture eros and philia, then choose habits like presence, helpful tasks, kind words, small tokens, and gentle touch to signal care.

Try prompts that help you learn how you give and receive

Want an easy way to practice care that fits each type? The Deepertalk Intimacy Card Game offers sweet prompts you can use on a walk or at the table, it helps you talk about love in plain words and notice which actions make each of you feel close.